2014 middle-of-the-year month is renamed

I have officially dubbed July 2014 forevermore as JU-LONG. It was excruciating.

After Jared flew back to Oregon, it only took a couple days to have all the unpacking and organizing done at the duplex. And then what? We were a family of six in a new state and town, with no summer activities planned, no schedule, no friends, no money and for some of us, no energy. That latter "some" being only me, apparently. I was done. I had spent the previous four months in manic-mode trying to get everything and everyone ready for our departure from Oregon while simultaneously getting everything in order for our arrival in Texas. I quit. I had no motivation (mentally, physically, emotionally) to do a thing. While still in the northwest, I had visions of exploring and finding places with the kids that we could return to with Jared at a later time, but those ideas were snuffed...1) because of the lack of aforementioned motivation and 2) because in one way or another, that too, would require money...whether that translated to entrance fees or gas for the suburban thanks to the monstrosity that Texas is. So that was out of the question. Let's face it. If I were still in Oregon with Jared away from home for a whole month, it would be lame, no doubt. But so much more tolerable and easier in familiar surroundings with friends and activities. Was I having a pity party? Absolutely! This month was hard!

Here's the long and short of how it all went down:

The day after Jared left, I swung by the home construction site to see how things were going and to see if anyone from the crew was around. That's when all of a sudden my heart sank with an incredible out-of-the-blue thought. "Houston, we have a problem!" Before we had returned home from the trip to Texas in April where we secured the house plans and made our design selections, I had decided to change the exterior color that we had originally picked out. I wanted to make the siding "well bred brown" (instead of the door) and swap the door color to "portabello" leaving the trim as "macadamia." But...when I drove by on July 8th to check on the progress, it was as if I had been hit with a ton of bricks! (No pun intended). I had changed the exterior color but FAILED to change the brick selection to match it. I have no sense of color or style, whatsoever, but even with my lack of a knack for such things, I KNEW the clash between the new siding color and original brick choice would be nothing short of hideous. THIS picture below is what the brick was when we left Texas (which, honestly, looks gross here...I don't know what we were thinking...oh right, we weren't, because we only had a few minutes to make our choices!...) coupled with a beige-ish/tan siding color.

But the siding was now BROWN!! Ewwwwww. Can we all say "Nasty"??

I found the superintendent, Dennis, and introduced myself to him--explaining that the future owners of this property were not phantoms, but did indeed exist as real people and that we had just arrived last week from Oregon. Before I approached him, I noticed a large order of bricks in my neighbor's driveway but none in mine, so I thought I might still have a chance. The only problem was...the day for making changes was long past and there would be a fee to the tune of a couple hundred dollars to make a change, assuming there was time to do so. At that point...I didn't really care. My concern was...could it still be changed? We never got an email or phone call or any communication that told us when the house building process began. So, in my defense, until we saw the framed house the week before, we were running under the assumption they hadn't even started on it yet. That was the  argument I had formulating in my head just in case I got some resistance from them.

When I explained the color change without the brick to match it, Dennis said he didn't think it would be a problem because he didn't believe it had been ordered yet. I think I just BARELY made it though. (Thank heaven for HUGE miracles!) I found the brick I wanted, right away. I saw it on another home with brown siding. I put in my request. The design gal called me and said they've got that brick and they can change my order for the $225 fee. The only problem--my next door neighbors have the EXACT same brick and it's against "design rules" to have two houses right next to each other with the same color and/or brick.

NNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!

Dang it!! So then I had to drive around the neighborhood trying to find brick I thought would work with our color and trim and make a choice...that day. And I was trying to get Jared's input and my friend's input and my mom's input all through blasted email and texting over the phone. It was majorly frustrating with a side of ridiculous.

I had it narrowed down to two. "Brushy Creek" is the lighter brick pictured here next to our already chosen exterior paint colors.

"Green Hollow" was the second choice.

There was a home with the same brown siding as ours with the first choice (lighter) brick up the street. Every time I looked at it though, the brick, next to the brown, looked pink. Maybe it was just the way the sun was hitting it, but the combination of colors didn't sit well with me. There was a home with the second (darker) brick choice, but the color of the siding was different so I kind of had to squint my eyes and imagine what it would look like. Because the Green Hollow brick had brown in it (even with the red clay undertones that I wasn't thrilled about), I decided to go with that one. It felt like this whole exercise was a chore in choosing the lesser of two evils while I tried not to hold a completely unwarranted design grudge against my new neighbors--whom I had yet to meet. I consoled myself with the fact that a) I won't have to look at my brick every day as I will be inside my home. AND b) I was indeed grateful it wasn't orange and that we could make the change. Oh and if you think I made a poor brick choice, please don't tell me!!! The exterior selection back in April was bad enough. I was not feeling good about anything on the exterior at this point. The cream (macadamia) color I picked out for the trim looked like butter cream yellow next to the brown. I tried not to dwell on the rising disappointment that swelled inside my chest whenever I considered the exterior of the house. We were now at the point of no return.

That first week without Jared was especially trying because we still did not have wifi or Internet access at the duplex. (First world problems? Maybe...) There just happened to be one small prong that was broken off inside the connector and we had to wait over a week, until Friday, 7/11 to get it repaired by the cable company. It was SUCH a DRAG for me because we seriously had no outside link with the world in which we live or with old friends, or family. I couldn't email anyone or search for things or find things to do in the future or check on accounts, etc. The lack of Internet access really exacerbated my feelings of loneliness (and productivity) during this transitional period--because every day that slogged by felt like a week--at the very minimum. Time stood still and refused to move forward.

But the Lord was aware of me and I received a tender mercy. One of the counselors in the Bishopric contacted me the middle of the week asking if Jake could serve as first counselor in the Teacher's quorum. I was, of course, completely fine with that and I took him to church early that second Sunday (the first without Jared) for his interview. As we were walking into the church building, the other counselor asked if he could meet with me for a minute. Brother Courtright (who I predict will be our next Bishop :) extended a call for me to serve as a primary instructor. I accepted and was grateful to have something to do. Something worthwhile to focus on. A purpose. I've never felt SO relieved to have a calling. I would only be teaching every other week because I am the second teacher for that class. Since I had been sustained that day during Sacrament meeting, I offered (okay, maybe begged...) to teach the following week. I was assigned to the group of 9-year-olds--all girls and one boy in that class...the age just a year older than Karcyn. I was super excited!

While I was grateful for the distraction and blessing of a calling to teach in Primary, it was only every other Sunday and I was not able to fill ALL my time down time with each lesson. I do not remember much about the month of July as a whole. I think that's by design. I did, however, enjoy reading several books. A luxury (because I'm such a slow reader) I hadn't been able to indulge in for a while. And we swam. A Lot. Like every afternoon except Wednesday, because I still held Wednesday as our laundry day and we threw a trip to the library in there, as well.

Swimming is awesome for kids and teenagers, especially when they have nothing else to do. Having unlimited access to a pool that's basically around the corner is awesome-er. But I ain't gonna lie. It's a lot of work with several kids of varying sizes. Thankfully, at this point in the game, my kids can dress themselves--assuming they can locate their bathing suit from the day prior and their towel and their goggles and their flip-flops. But there's this thing called the sun. And it can be dangerous. Before leaving Oregon, I vowed to myself that if my children got any sort of sunburn while living in Texas, it would not be on MY watch. So after we spent a good twenty to thirty minutes making sure everyone had what they needed, we began the sunscreen shower. I had purchased a couple bottles of spray sunscreen for the bodies and kept some lotion on-hand for the face. It didn't take long to learn that we would go through a bottle of spray sunscreen every three days for this family of six. We would definitely need to buy it in bulk. I am well aware that lotion sunscreen would be more cost effective financially, but the alternative--helping kids rub it into their backs and hard to reach places and making sure we covered every spot--every.time.we.swam--would break me mentally and send me right over the edge. It was totally worth the few extra bucks for efficiency and sanity at this point. We would spend a couple hours at the pool each day. JJ figured out how to keep himself upright in his life jacket and I had finally "arrived!" I don't always have to get in the water now! Oh, and we discovered the pavement around the pool can, in fact, burn our feet!!

Speaking of the water. I am still amazed that the sun is what heats the pool water here. And under a blazing July sun, contrary to popular belief, that water, though wet, is not always refreshing. Most times it feels like you're swimming in a big bathtub. But--I will say how wonderful it is to get OUT, especially if there's a small breeze. Then you start to cool off a bit. It's the perfect combo of warm and comfortably refreshing. Totally opposite of Oregon. Unless it was near 100 degrees, you took one step into the artificially heated pool and had to clamp your mouth shut so as not to yelp or gasp at the shock of the water temperature. You had to just rip the band aid off and get in all at once. After that, you had to keep moving to stay warm. Getting out was the worst. There was almost always a breeze if not wind and my kids' lips would turn blue. It was a common ritual to come home from swimming in our subdivision pool in the Oregon summers and then have a mug of hot chocolate to warm up! Most days we had the small pool by our duplex all to ourselves. There is a downside, however. The subdivisions here don't provide lifeguards, like our Oregon subdivision did. I suspect it might be because it's warm enough to swim all day long (6am to 10pm) and staffing it with a lifeguard would be too difficult. But that also meant my older boys were not old enough to go without me--which was a lame rule we had to get used to. But because I didn't work during the day, we could go to the pool whenever we wanted and seldom did we have to share it.

I was grateful for the scouting and young men programs at church to instantly connect Cooper and Jake to young men their age. Cooper's group wasn't meeting weekly during the summer, like Jake's was, but they had a couple things planned in July that helped give him something to look forward to, like a fishing trip at the end of that first week by ourselves.

I discovered long ago that when I cook dinner, I cook for Jared. Not my children. I suppose that sounds a little harsh coming from a mother, but I cook for my husband and if they happen to like it, fantastic. If they don't like what I made for Jared, then they can go hungry. Our family food motto: This isn't Burger King. You can't have it your way. In case you are worried about the well being of my children during Ju-Long, don't you fret. I did feed them while Jared was absent, but we may or may not have had cold cereal a few times a week. And pasta the other nights. All joking aside, I did actually cook a couple times a week for them :) Our meals were very laid back to say the least. I also brought Teen Tuesday and Tween Thursday back into the rotation where Jake cooked one night and Cooper cooked the other so they could continue to hone in on their cooking skills...and it was a nice break for me!

Here are a few other things we did/that happened in Ju-Long:

JJ put his climbing skills to use right away. He got to the syrup bottle in the pantry and did this little number in their room. This carpet was all but brand new. No stains on it when we arrived! But not anymore...actually, no stains, more like...crunchiness.

He even managed to leave his HAND PRINT in a puddle of syrup. So gross! I cannot stand the smell of syrup when we're not eating anything that requires it or when we're doing the dishes after eating it. I also learned it's not so easy to get out of carpet either!

Karcyn had a play date with her new friend Karlie from the ward. She came and swam with us a couple times.

We got wild and crazy one night and walked the half mile down to the subdivision park, played for a bit...AND walked back. Holy hot. And we started out at 7pm!!

We enjoyed the HUGE, ELECTRIFYING thunder storms and downpours!!

Okay--not everyone liked the thunder! Karcyn comforted JJ when he used her to hide after a clap of thunder shook the duplex. Jake had the joy of TENT camping in the middle of that storm cell with the scouts. YOWZAS!!!

One Monday night, we took advantage of the "Buy One, Get One" at Yogurtland. Helps that the owner is LDS :)

We checked on the progress of the house once a week. By July 16th, we had a newly poured driveway!

Jake did a LOT of Lego building. Something he didn't have a ton of time for as an 8th grader in the high school marching band and I know he missed it. "Fortunately" for him, he had nothing but TIME on his hands. I'm grateful he chose to use it in a constructive way. I'm not anti-gun or anything, but I still have a healthy respect for them and want my kids to as well. So I wasn't super thrilled he chose to build handguns out of his limited Lego collection. But I gotta give props to him! They were impressive! This one came complete with a scope.

This one looked awfully real from a distance! A little TOO real!!

He did, however, use his mad Lego skills to construct a homemade Backgammon board that he and Cooper actually played on. Pretty cool!

Karcyn also enjoyed playing with Legos. (They were a life saver!!)

JJ enjoyed "hiding" from us and made his disappearances a little unnerving when we called out to him and he wouldn't respond. In fact, on this particular day, July 18th, we thought he was truly missing. I looked in their room and this was what I saw from the doorway. When I didn't see him, I left and continued my search through the rest of the duplex--which wasn't that big with came with very few hiding spots. Not finding him anywhere else, I came back to his room and that's when I started digging around. He was still in his spot. Hadn't moved. Hadn't made a sound. Can you see him? (You're killing me, Smalls!!)

The kids made forts.

We tried out Bahama Bucks. Note to self: shaved ice melts a whole lot faster in Texas than it does in Oregon! Miss Karcyn didn't care, however.

The kids also made fun creations and animals with their play dough. 

This was Calvin's creation.

Almost every night, I would wake up in the wee hours of the morning to find a child or two who somehow wound up in MY bed. And they stayed there until morning. I know it continued because I was too tired and too lazy to carry them back to their own beds. Considering their lives were a bit sideways at the moment, I let it slide. But just you wait until Dad comes back...

I longed for Sundays. They were the day I looked forward to the most--filling my spiritual well, adult interaction, trying to meet new people, and two hours without my children. They were also the day I dreaded the most. Getting the kids ready to go, attempting to have a reverent, spiritual morning and trying to keep them from getting on each other's nerves (mine included) until Sacrament meeting started at 1pm, to say nothing of sitting alone on the bench in the chapel for 70 minutes wrestling with kids who didn't want to be there and capitalized on the fact that I was clearly outnumbered. Calvin and JJ were the worst behaved. Cooper was no better. Jake couldn't help out during the first part of the meeting, because he was, as he should be, administering the Sacrament. I spent most my time in the halls or outside the church building. The first Sunday I was teaching my primary class, Calvin had a massive meltdown, while I was already floundering with JJ in the hall. (How are kids SO much STRONGER than us adults??) Calvin wouldn't stop wailing and refused to cooperate, so I escorted him outside. I was trying not to become distressed myself. I know I was worried about how people were perceiving this new family from Oregon and that made me feel worse. But people didn't know us yet and I didn't want child tantrums and meltdowns to be their first impression. I had just a few minutes before I needed to get to my primary class. I don't remember how it resolved, but Calvin finally trudged to his class, which was taught by the two most amazing brethren, Brother White and Brother Andrus. Despite my efforts to not feel this way, I had a very passionate love/hate relationship with Sundays while Jared was gone.

This is what JJ did after walking in the door when we returned from church each Sunday. He could barely make the walk inside and as soon as he got near the mattress, he toppled forward. And slept.

This is a BEFORE picture of JJ--while he's conscious and not testing his mother's patience in the church pew.

I finally got smart. There was another family who moved in the same Sunday we did--with a bunch of teenage girls. I asked the oldest, Dara, if she would be so kind as to sit with us so when I had to leave with JJ (or in case I never made it in to begin with--which has happened!) I could at least know that the Houghs weren't being completely inappropriate in my absence. She was there for the second to last Sunday without Jared and when they went out of town, I turned to another young woman, our future neighbor, Ashley, for help. I'm grateful to the Mangisi and Downs families who loaned their daughters to help serve our family and only wish I had thought of it sooner. At the same time, we didn't really know each other until then anyway.

Jake flew out of Houston on the 28th of July to return to Oregon for his first high adventure--thanks to the incredible generosity of the McCulloughs. Getting him to the airport was an unexpected adventure described here. But we survived!! And that meant we were on the official count down until Jake and Jared left Oregon for good. Nine more days and we'd be a full-strength family of Houghs. I think I can, I think I can, I think I can...