Turning points

Both Jake and Cooper each made an important decision this past spring that we believe were pretty big turning points for them. These decisions weren't easy and as their parents we are grateful they used their agency wisely. Jared spoke in Sacrament meeting in our new College Station ward the Sunday before school started in August. He actually referenced both these experiences as examples in his talk which was about the power of the Plan of Salvation and how we've tried to prioritize our temporal lives by keeping an eternal perspective. Below are the excerpts from Jared's talk in italics.

"Before we moved here, our oldest son, Jake, was involved in band. He started playing the saxophone when he was in 6th grade and was really good at it right off the bat. He worked hard, practiced and as an 8th grader was invited by the high school band director to join the marching band as the only 8th grader. It was a wonderful experience for him. He met some fantastic kids and got to know a group he could associate with before he went into high school. He even earned a varsity letter. He was looking forward to four more years of marching band, possible college scholarships and the opportunity to participate in other activities such as cross-country and seminary. Seminary at Century High School is time release [a built-in class period], cross-country is held after school and band is later in the evening. Jake had his whole schedule figured out. It all fit.

Then we moved.

Seminary shifted from time release to early morning at 6:45am. Concurrently he learned that due to the excessive heat, both cross-country and band practices were held at the same time...in the mornings. We sat down and discussed this with Jake. While Jake knew he had the option to do a home study course of seminary and meet once a week with a group to discuss the assignments, he chose to sacrifice both band (including any chance for a music scholarship) and cross-country to be able to attend seminary daily with his peers and teachers. Preparing for a [two year service] mission has always been a goal for Jake and he knew that seminary--where he could feel the spirit and benefit from both sharing his testimony and experiences and hearing his friends do the same--would be a crucial part of that preparation. He loves band and jazz and the saxophone and was looking forward to competing in cross-country, but he chose the better part. His eternal perspective helped him choose between a good thing and the best thing."

I just want to clarify that there's nothing wrong with home-study seminary. And if anyone can do it, Jake certainly can. He's responsible, thoughtful and diligent. But--that just isn't how Jake envisioned his seminary experience. It's a lot like the new 'Come Follow Me' curriculum with the youth. It's about feeling the spirit and sharing and growing and learning from each other that helps deepen one's conversion. So we applaud him for making a tough decision, but one that we believe will have a great impact on him. And of course, we testified that you will never be punished (temporally or spiritually) for wanting more of the Lord's influence in your life. Additionally, the Lord is ever mindful of what he sacrificed with his talent on the saxophone and we're confident other doors will open for him in the future.

Since band and cross-country were out, the only other thing Jake wanted to try was basketball. In Texas, you enroll in the freshman basketball class which counts as your PE credit and that's how the team is formed. Perfect! Basketball is a class and it's played indoors (practices not predetermined by the heat), so Jake doesn't have to worry about it interfering before school. Wrong-o. The freshman basketball team has to practice at 6:30am so that JV and Varsity can have the courts after school. Of course they do.

The good news is that early morning practices are only during the game season which is mid/end of October to mid-March. That's a big difference compared to the time commitment with band. Jake would miss an equivalent of 2 years of seminary with his peers if he did band. Jake would only miss a few months with freshman basketball. Weighing his options, Jake moved forward with basketball so he could be involved in something and knows our expectation to graduate from seminary still applies. He has kept up on his assignments that he misses and attends seminary every Wednesday evening before his mutual activity each week to keep his attendance up. Being new to the area, it was also really beneficial for him to start seminary for a couple of months at the beginning of the year so he could get to know his peers and teachers before he had to attend regular basketball practices.

Now, Cooper.
"At the end of every school year, Cooper's school (Butternut Creek) holds a school-wide assembly where kids can audition to participate and then perform. Since this would be his last year at the school, Cooper wanted to be involved and auditioned by singing a very popular song. He was thrilled when he came home one day announcing that he had been selected to sing in the assembly. He immediately began to polish his performance by practicing with the song as it played on the computer, with the words scrolling so he could memorize them better. This was a song that the entire family had listened to many times. It had a great beat and was very fun to listen to, but like many songs with lyrics, you don't always catch the words that go with that catchy beat. As we began to really hear the words, we grew uneasy about Cooper singing it. Among some of the lyrics was a line that talked about feeling wrong for doing the right thing and feeling right for doing the wrong thing. Sounds very similar to a scripture we all know (2 Nephi 15:20). Cooper had a decision to make. At the beginning of every school year, we choose a scripture as a family to guide and strengthen us throughout the year. Last year it was 1 Timothy 4:12 "be thou an example of the believers, in word, in conversation, in charity, in spirit, in faith, in purity." In addition to reviewing our school scripture theme with Cooper, we went straight to the For Strength of Youth booklet and read the section on media and entertainment together. And then we left it to Cooper. He got on his bike and went back to the school and let his teacher know he could not sing the song and asked, knowing the answer might be no, if he could pick a different song to sing. He was told he could, but he would have to do it the coming Monday and he'd only have one chance to get it right. He auditioned again and his audition was flawless. He was selected to sing that as a solo at the assembly. Cooper recognized that this was about more than just a song. He had an opportunity to set an example for his peers and teachers at his school and was not afraid to stand what he knew was right. Cooper had an opportunity to let his Heavenly Father know that he wanted to be on the Lord's side and not slip, ever-so-slightly into Satan's grasp. While I was proud of him for the decision he made, I know his Heavenly Father was smiling as well and cheering him on at the assembly that day."

Cooper chose to sing "To the Sky" by Owl City. It was actually one of the songs we put on Jake's Trail to Eagle video. What I wasn't expecting were the few words Cooper shared with the entire school body before he sang the song. He said that this was his last assembly because his family was moving to Texas. Then he asked the kids to raise their hands if they thought he was flying to his new home. A good chunk of them did. He explained that we were actually driving. Then he added, very profoundly, "In a way, though, I will be flying to Texas. I'm taking to the sky on a new adventure." It was very touching. He sang his song and at the end, his former 2nd grade teacher and Karcyn's current teacher, Mrs. Vick came over to me, tears streaming down her cheeks and said she was so moved by his choice of song and said how much she was going to miss us. Just the sight of her tears and how she spoke through them, made me start to cry immediately, too! I wasn't expecting that either! We will miss that school and all the teachers and staff and administrators whom we grew to love and appreciate so much as they were a crucial part of the community village trying to help us raise our children.